Growing towards the light

When I was looking at the flowers on our coffee table I noticed that the tulips had drastically taken a right turn. I then realized they had decided to grow towards the light. I think we are a lot like that.

I've been meaning to blog for weeks and something always came up. Work, kids, trying to do right by them and staying ahead of my goals at work. I've often complained or vented about not being everything to everyone no matter how hard I try but tonight it all came to me- we are all struggling with being the best to everyone, all the time. We are constantly trying to accomplish everything on the to-do list or Saturday list when none of that matters. Instead we should be worried about growth.

Growth with God. Spiritual growth. Growing towards the light. Sometimes I think God creates moments or road blocks to make us choose him. Moments that make us reach for him. Two funerals this week have made our house reach for him... Ask him 100 why's, why nots and what if's. Not exactly getting the answers we were searching for but getting comfort in knowing that he has this greater plan. No, the hope of a plan doesn't soothe the pain but we are promised that God is close to the broken hearted.

I had a sense of guilty peace with me this weekend. Grateful for my family and guilty for those who have suffered unimaginable loss this past week. I know prayers are being heard for understanding, peace and love, for all that has been lost.

Today I want peace our hearts. I don't want to feel rushed at work, with my kids... In the moment. I want to enjoy every moment. I want the warmth of the sun and to feel that growth in all that I do. I want my family to grow towards the light.

I know he has placed hands on these hurting families. Lord, please give them the warmth and comfort that they so desperately seek. Amen.

Making Waffles

Weekends seem to plan "up" quickly in the fall but in the winter/spring I start to feel less full and a better ability to say no, easier. I think I get to the point where I start to feel so over scheduled that I can't enjoy what we are doing in the moment. So when I push back a little- the planned moments are all that much sweeter.

Most weekends lately have been open. Spending Friday and Saturday nights at home and with sick season in our rear view mirror(fingers crossed), the plans have included, not having any plans. So when Alissa mentioned having our friend's family of five over on a Sunday morning for an impromptu breakfast- I was in. Sounds small and not really like a plan at all- but it was this delicious, Sunday morning that was {full}of kids, joy, giggles and sticky•sweet memories, that have stamped my heart with good thoughts every-time I even glance at that waffle maker. In my world I deem things calendar worthy- and this was worthy to the fullest.

Alissa always reminds me of a line in a movie where the animated donkey excitedly says, " in the mornin', I'm makin' waffles!" I love that line because I love the memories it brings of togetherness. Not just on that morning- but when we do things spur of the moment and drink from the richness that the moment holds. Alissa reminds me that even when I'm tired from working all week- to make fun plans, even if it's a wagon ride because the memories will be forever in my {camera} and on my heart. Moments that cannot be recreated. Ever.

I admit that as a mom there are weekends I choose not to load all three up with bags and food and sippy cups. There are Friday nights where I am like, "oh hell no, the zoo again? Not tomorrow." And then I am reminded of the joy that those moments bring when the loading and unloading become unimportant in the details. It's not "all in the details", it's all in what you take from the memories. The pictures, the smiles, the gratefulness is where those sweet thoughts sleep.

No big plans again this weekend- but I have a feeling, memories will be made.

Beam me up

Recently I was told about a new pink song. I like her and gave it a listen. It's very clear to me that its about loss and having a minute with that person in heaven. She says she wouldn't know what to say if given that minute. I'm not exactly sure what loss she is speaking of- but I would imagine its about a child. I've been in conversations lately about what would be worse?! I'm not sure and could never answer but in the new year I made promises to myself that I would be more present. More present in my kids lives- whit's and my own.

I feel like so far I've been really successful at that- getting out of town for a night with whit, more park trips, February birthday month, more lunches with my kids and a genuine effort of putting everyone behind those four people in my life. I've also put God at the front of my alone time. Focusing on what he wants for my family and what path he wants me on. At first this felt weird and now I know it was what he wanted and I was resisting.

There is this hilarious cartoon I've caught on YouTube lately that was obviously made by a multiples mom. She is annoyed because someone says, "oh you have multiples, so you're done?!" Lol I love how people assume they know our lives. I've gotten good at this triplet thing. I could do one baby no sweat. Just sayin'.

Baby fever. I'll take my temp later and hopefully it's gone down. Too many blogs about new babies and I can smell them.

Have a good rest of the week everyone.

Renewed

My march for babies kick of is this week so slowing down to enjoy my birthday was kind of not even on the radar. However, in true Alissa fashion, she planned a fun night of Mexican food for me and about 25 friends and family members. It was perfect. In every single way.

Reminded me to slow down and enjoy my life, my kids, yummy food and all that God has handed me. Reminded me of where I was years ago and how being at my lowest gave me a stronger relationship with God. He really did make me give it all to him.

To be surrounded by my three littles and to be surrounded by the people that literally picked me up off the floor when my cycles failed- felt good, really good. I felt so present tonight. So in tune with my kids needs and being their momma! So present in my husbands life even though some days it feels like we are passing in the hallways of a whirlwind life. Birthdays are funny. Mostly because the older we get we ask,"what's left to celebrate?" but oh, such a sweet, sweet day to celebrate thankfulness. Grace, for a year full of mistakes, and hope for a year of renewal.

It was perfect in everyday. I think I'm gonna love 35.