October to December

I think as moms we cram like 100 days into the final months of the year. You know, summer is leisure and easy and then all of a sudden Halloween hits and we are running around like maniacs on a hunt for some last dying wish and a schedule so packed-no one could conquer it. Party invites, holiday outfits to order for kids, gifts to buy, turkeys to stuff, school programs, school pictures, presents to buy, teacher gifts to make perfect, cookies to bake, parties to plan..... Can I take a breath? Please?!

So, my work event was on October 21st and then came several other work deadlines shortly after. Sick kids from week to week, a tube surgery for Riggs and about 59 work coffee or lunch dates to push 2014 into a perfect jumping spot, meals to juggle, transporting triplets all over the world and just generally surviving. And guilt, another nag I carry because I'm a working momma- yep it was in full red alert too. I hate it. Yep, I was in that year end mad dash. 

I survived thanksgiving and felt like ok, this won't be bad we are almost there... We purchased all of the gifts and we weren't entirely broke so I thought- yep we are doing this well- and then- on Christmas Eve- it happened. I had 102 and felt like I could die. Yep. Perfect timing. Isn't that the way it goes? I called the doctor and they called in some meds but by the time it reached the pharmacy they closed. Awesome. This was going to suck. But by gosh, my kids would never know. 

So on Christmas morning there I was. Medicated to the max and dying. I kept it together because this was the first year these littles knew the meaning of Christmas. They would talk about Jesus and they would want to roll play the entire Christmas story. This momma had to feel better, fast. The wisemen were in high demand. 

On Christmas night I made dinner for our entire family with the help of whit and alissa. I wanted to collapse but had promised Mema several weeks before that I would take it on this year. The second the kids were in bed I literally melted into mine. My throat hurt, my eyes hurt and my head was boiling. I kept thinking about all the prior months/days and how I push myself too hard. We all do. 

The day after Christmas I was at the doctors office at 11 am. He looked at me and said, " I know what you have." I knew he thought the flu and I knew he was wrong. As we talked he looked at my throat and it was evident that it was tonsillitis and a severe sinus infection. I was using a box of Kleenex every hour. I never ran out of snot. 

I walked out with two shots and three meds and was told to return for two more shots over the next two days. I went through the motions of kids, meals and bed and don't really remember a whole lot. Today was my final shot and l still feel about 30%. This has been a doozie.

But even with all that. I got to do some of my favorite things this week/season and here they are:

Candlelight service with my babies

Holding one singing silent night

Christmas Eve at Mema pats which included our traditional menu complete with chicken salad and pimento cheese finger sandwiches 

Telling our three about baby Jesus every single night in December with their nativity scene

The zoo on a day with sunshine and 60's

Bathe my babies

Take a nap

Eat soup

Mailed 146 Christmas cards

Give gifts

Eat donuts

Make dinner for a group

Eat donuts at the park 

Have girls nights

Girls movie days

Take naps

Eat pie

Visitors from out of town 

Let my kids stay up late

Eat ice cream

Eat bruschetta on a casual night 

Watch movies on my couch 

Color with gg

Playdoh with gg

Tickle Riggs

Chase Becker

Talk to whit about Christmas and the kids reaction

Talk about "next year"

Make plans for seaside

Eat Mexican food with my dad at a local place

Watch Mema pat with my three

It was good y'all. Even sick, it was good.

 

I hope yours was your kinda perfect.

<<Baby WE'VE come A LOng WaY>>

Today we...

Wake up and they patiently wait on breakfast to be made

Before

you had to prep breakfast and have it ready on the table or lots of crying ensued 

Today we...

they sit at the table like big kids with no special seats

Before 

they had a triplet table and then, a hook on booster seat

Today we .....

only take one nap

Before 

it was two naps ( until about 4 months a ago!)(it was pretty awesome)

Today we ....

do our own thing and play on our own

Before 

we needed constant attention and entertainment

Today we ...

take very little "amo" for an out to eat experience

Before 

we packed a lunch sack with 20 plus items for entertaining because three is hard!

Before we...

lived by a strict schedule

Today we still have a schedule but we are flexible with bed time.

Before I....

hated leaving whit alone on a bath night and wouldn't do that to anyone...

Now it's much easier and anyone can handle

Before you ...

couldn't leave the bathroom while they were in the bath

Now you can clean and straighten their room while they play.

Before people.... 

used to ask me how we did it 

now they ask me if we will have another.

Before we....

went through about 15 diapers a day

Now we just use three at nap and three at bed

Before....

 traveling sounded like a nightmare

Now I'm working on booking our summer trip

Before....

 memorizing bible verses seemed like a far off accomplishment

Now they ask for Jesus

Before....

 I felt like I was busy

Now I really am

Before I ....

wanted everything perfect all of the time-

Now I realized it was, the day we had them and we can't make it better than that

Before I ...

thought I loved whit

Now I don't know if I could love anyone more

Before I....

believed kids wouldn't change my life much

Now I know I was dumb

Before I ....

thought kids would enhance my life

Now I know they are my life

Before they ...

were frustrated and couldn't communicate their wants

Now they talk a mile a minute and we "get" about 90%

Before we ...

had lots of understanding friends

Now we have about a handful

Before I ...

tended to a lot of petty friends and unhealthy friendships.

Now I've moved on, forgiven them and myself and prayed for a loving God to give us all grace 

Before we ...

couldn't wait for a night out

Now we would rather be home with them

Before I...

 didn't think we would make it

Now, I know we will. 

Before I...

Didn't know why we were chosen to be parents to multiples

Now, I know exactly why

Before we...

Prayed for one kiddo

Now we pray that we give Him all the glory for giving us three.

Sleep tight friends, it's Christmas and the weather is cold and there is an awesome new coffee shop downtown. 

You take my mourning and turn it into dancing...

You take my weeping and turn it into laughing.....

You take my sadness and turn it into joy! 

Christmess?

Sorry for the old post! Just now getting to this one!

December 8th

Today, church was about forgiveness and how Christmas sometimes brings all the messy to the front of our lives. I remember Christmases spent with my mom when my parents were together. I think I was three or four and I remember it being perfect. I remember stringing popcorn on thread with a needle and fruit loops on yarn. She was good at holidays, she was good at us. I don't remember messy or anger. 

Her dad lived in witchita falls and would come in and stay at a hotel. He never missed a Christmas and always had a car full of toys wrapped. He would just stay one night if that. He would pick us up and we would drive to some parking lot and while my brother and I sat in the back we would open tons of presents while he cheered us on. It was thrilling. Literally everything we wanted and in a 30 minute span. I never thought it was weird that they only said a few words to one another. She never went with us. She never came to the hotel. He would show up Christmas and mail money at birthdays. He was constant and faithful but until now, I never wondered what their relationship was like. They are both gone and I will never know. I wonder if there was a forgiveness that was needed. 

When I got married the pressure of running back and forth between families never really existed. My family was traditional and Whit's, easy going with no real set plans. My mom wasn't around so I was always sort of my own decision maker when it came to my life after college. When we got married holidays were simple. Each year, we've always seen everyone but I always wonder if someone is mad at me or desires more of our time but never says so. Now with three kids in tow- running all over is almost impossible. And because my family all lives close by we choose to stick around the neighborhood and ask Whit's family to join us.

I think everyone does what they want to do but I also think that kids make the differences in how much effort we put forward. Or at least they should. I think this month needs to be more about forgiveness than the hoopla of the December shiny month. Focusing on the fact that all of this is for us- but in order to cash in on all this amazing, we need to love one another through it all. 

Jesus. He's the whole reason. 

Three years ago. Today.

Today is my favorite day of the year. It used to be on thanksgiving. I'm in love with cooler temps and how everyone is in a thankful mood. But three years ago on this very day, thankful couldn't begin to describe what went down in our bathroom. 

It was day eight of our third and final fertility cycle. I was a mess(inside) at thanksgiving and had spent the day at a friends family thanksgiving instead of my own family's because I couldn't handle all of the questions. 

We came home and I wanted the night to hurry up so in the am I could test. I was going to secretly test because I knew whit would be mad that I was rushing the process. I thought that this was a sign that he wanted to prolong the inevitable- that it would be negative, again. 

Normally you wait for the doctor blood test and then watch the levels go up to secure a positive but I was convinced that my friends has tested on day 8 and I couldn't wait any longer for my news either. I woke up at 4:30 with an extremely full bladder. In the dark I fumbled  around with the test trying not to wake whit. I ruined the test by peeing too much!!! Humored and defeated I slipped  back into bed. That was my last test of my pack of 100. Yep, us infertile girls buy in bulk. 

My eyes popped open at 7 am. Whit was already staring at me. I told him I tested. I told him I really wanted to test again and he quickly said " yes, I agree." I couldn't believe my ears. He jumped out of bed threw on some clothes and went and got me two new tests. We hurried into the bathroom and I patiently peed on the first stick. We waited the allotted time and there was only one line :( - not two that would signify a pregnancy. I was crushed. I knew that if that line didn't show up at all that day, it more than likely wouldn't appear on day nine or ten. I said, " I never get two lines whit, I never will." He said, "wait!!! There are two lines!!!" I called my aunt crying so hard she thought someone was hurt. I said, " we're pregnant, we're pregnant, we're pregnant"!

Can you even believe how faint that second one is? And there it is folks, my favorite day. Can you blame me? 

So ever since that day three years ago I have deemed the day after thanksgiving my favorite day. Today was filled with my favorite things: the shepherd triplets, an awesome scarf from lulu lemon, some yummy new perfume , went to see a movie(frozen, the trips first movie!) and got set up on the couch with a yummy dinner and Christmas vacation ( and pecan pie!)

It was perfect. I am thankful. I am blessed. Three years ago today changed our worlds forever and I'm pretty crazy about the day. It's more than a holiday for me. It's more than a celebration. It's my favorite day out of all of the days there ever were before.