the shep trips

Last year was a turning point in my life. I had become depressed. Rarely going anywhere but to work and home. I quit cooking dinner and resided to my bed most nights. Our house was empty. It was sad. I thought whit would give up on me. I thought he might give up on us. He never acted like it one time. I just felt as if he should. I was so dark. I had pushed my friends away. I pushed my family away. We had maxed out our checking accounts and our savings accounts. We had maxed out our emotional accounts. No baby.

We borrowed more money and decided to roll the dice once more. We had a new doctor and a new plan. Because I couldn't bare to be around family we made plans for thanksgiving. We spent it with friends. This used to be my favorite holiday but I couldn't bare it at this stage in our lives. We felt like failures and we couldn't feel negative in the final days of a cycle. We could test on day 10. The day after thanksgiving was day 8.

We tested that morning. Whit drove to target and we both sat in a dark bathroom and shook with fear. One line came quick. The second one... Well it wasn't there. I almost melted on the floor.. Until whit said. There it is. There's a SECOND line. I jumped, cried and couldn't breathe. It was a miracle. God answered our prayers.


The next seven months were a blur. The best time of my life. So, yesterday was a year after finding out we were going to be parents. After I rocked baby Riggs to sleep, then geeg and then baby b, I thought.. Yep this is all that I thought it would be. The very very best.



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